Dog Training Poem

Whist watching a dog training program, i looked at the dog being trained and thought what if the dog could speak? better still what if he could write a poem?. What would he say to the trainer? and think it would go something like this.

As you continuously teach me
To sit, fetch and stay
I wish could talk
As I have something to say

Like, I want a day off
From fetching the ball
Because your constant commands
Drive me up the wall

And what’s with the food
The biscuits and stuff
Surely you know
In makes me feel rough

Now stop all this training
Let’s just walk in the park
Let me chase squirrels
And have the occasional bark

Or the next time you ask me
To sit up and beg
I will lean to one side
And pi** on your leg